I want to share a bit about my evolution in delegating because I really had to work on this. My issue with delegating flares up with work and personal stuff, so I’ve got a ton of examples, but today, I’d share a fun and lighthearted story that was at the forefront of my mind.
When my husband and I first got married, we used to host a lot of parties. And when I say a lot, I mean more than our fair share. Now, I have to admit I am the queen of prep. Before a party, everything was cut and ready for last-minute preparations. Dishes were labeled, tables were set, and hosting was fun and stress-free. I know there’s a lot of you out there that are preppers.
You make the lists and have everything planned out. And that’s great. But isn’t it a lot of pressure? On my journey, I’ve unpacked much of the reasoning behind the self-induced pressure, which has been fascinating.
Have you ever wondered why you might be such a planner? Or, is it beyond planning, and you can confidently say you might be a control freak? LOL. I’m raising my hand here. And I want to tell you the other side of control freak is so liberating!
Whatever it is behind your actions, I like to reference what I call the Evolution of Experience.
Let me explain. There are circumstances in life. Events are caused by the outside world. They could be the project due at work. The family issue that needs navigating. Maybe, as in this particular case, it’s a special occasion.
Well, these circumstances occur, and they drive our thoughts. If you think about it, everything is a circumstance, and all circumstances are neutral.
That is, until we assign a thought to it.
Our thoughts are how we interpret circumstances and what we make of them, and they drive our feelings.
The thought I need to be stronger if I had to delegate this. People won’t respect me, or they’ll think I’m not capable if I need to delegate it.
They can’t do it as good as I can.
All thoughts, right? Thoughts are choices thought, and we need awareness to understand our choices. If you didn’t listen to last week on awareness and cultivating it, go back and check out the episode.
So, we have these thoughts, which create feelings that result in actions or inactions, which create new circumstances. That’s the down and dirty of the Evolution of Experience.
Now, when it comes to delegation- the choice to delegate or not comes down to that – a choice. And that one choice can help you find balance in your life, especially if you are overwhelmed by everything you have to do.
So, my evolution of delegation. Fast forward to my husband’s 50th birthday, and life had become more complicated. Having parties was still fun, but it was also work.
Instead of prepping and getting ready, I found myself stressed and overwhelmed. I wanted everything to be right. That’s when we decided to hire a caterer. It was a relief, but it also felt like I was losing a part of the joy of hosting. Again, a thought. But let me tell you all. Once the food was selected, the decorations, and the band. I could move on to something else. I didn’t have to think or do, and that was a relief.
What are you dealing with now that is causing you stress that could be delegated? And if not fully delegated, what might you ask for help with? The thing is, there are different levels of ease in life. You can do it all yourself, get partial help, or delegate it all out. And when it comes to creating energy and life balance, you need to approach it from where you currently are in your stage of life.
So, I alluded to this before, but many of us struggle to find balance in our busy lives, just like I did with party hosting. But how can we learn to let go when all we know is holding on?
I want to give you three tips today that I found helpful in my journey.
[Tip 1: Worthiness]
Worthiness. Often, we struggle to delegate because we don’t feel worthy of receiving help. We feel like we should handle everything ourselves. But remember, you are worthy of support and assistance. It’s okay to ask for help when needed. In fact, it’s a sign of strength, not weakness. This week, I asked a friend to help me complete a daunting application, and I had my head spinning just looking at everything they required. It took us four hours, but we knocked it out.
At first, I felt bad asking, but when I looked at the thoughts around it, I was like, why aren’t you worth having help? What would you do if she asked for assistance with the same thing? I realized it was a useless thought. So, question your beliefs on worthiness and see where that leads you.
Now, let’s talk about delegation when it comes to daily routine. Finding time for self-care and relaxation can be a challenge in our daily lives. I can’t tell you how many women beat themselves up for feeling too much to get their nails done or even relax in a bath at the end of the day. Sometimes, life is so fast-paced that we don’t have time for regular activities. But there’s a way to integrate delegation into our routines. And that brings me to tip #2
[Tip 2: Grounding]
I know this might sound funny, but how often have you taken a step back and considered why you need to delegate. Why do you feel maxed out? Why are you burning the candle at both ends, trying to get everything done and be everything to everyone? When you step back, you can see how ground yourself in your routines can be immensely beneficial. When you can find small moments to connect with yourself, even in the midst of a busy day, you realize delegating is one of the most fun ways to create more balance in life. Whether it’s a short meditation, a walk, or simply a few deep breaths, grounding helps you regain focus and balance. You can take a look at what you really need to do and what you need to let go of, which brings me to tip 3.
Tip three has to do with tackling the anxiety that comes along with delegation. Because, let’s face it, anxiety is something many of us grapple with in various aspects of our lives. It can feel overwhelming, but there are effective ways to address it and one of the biggest ways is simply to Let go or, as a mentor of mine says, “stop holding on.” Delegate that crap!
[Tip 3: Letting Go]
Anxiety can run deep, and simple relaxation techniques often don’t address the underlying issues. That’s where delegation comes into play. Seek guidance and support to identify the steps to tame your anxiety and regain control of your life. It’s about letting go of the notion that you have to handle everything on your own.
When I started receiving coaching years ago, I thought I was going for career development and handling the stress that came with making a name for myself. And you know what? It was the little things like this that came up during sessions. I remember vividly talking about delegation and developing a plan to help advance myself by tossing the little things overboard.
If you need help identifying what you need to delegate to create more balance in your life, reach out for coaching. Check out www. Truebasishealth.com, and if you are more of a do-it-yourself kind of person, there are still many resources on the website under the resources tab.
Everything from how to Tame Your Anxiety, Tips to Invite Balance into Your life, and a whole series on the layers of life – the body, mind, and spiritual side. Something for everyone at every stage of your journey.
So, I hope today helped get a new perspective on delegating to find balance and reduce stress.
Remember, you are worthy of help; grounding yourself in daily routines can make a difference, and it’s okay to seek support when dealing with anxiety and figuring out what to throw overboard.
Thank you for joining us on this episode of the Ripple Effect Podcast. I hope you found a bit of peace and permission listening. Remember, small changes can lead to significant improvements in your life. Until next time, keep creating ripples of positive change, and don’t be afraid to delegate along the way.
